70+ Conversation Starters for Couples: Never run out of talking points
No one can really explain why it happens, but as a couple, it's natural to experience moments in your relationship where there’s a fall in conversation and you feel like you're running out of things to say.
When this happens, it's important to try to keep the conversation flowing to maintain a strong connection with your partner. Without these conversations, you naturally tend to drift apart.
Every relationship expert knows that keeping the conversation alive is an essential dating tip and in this article, we'll explore some fun and engaging conversation starters for couples that will help you get to know each other better and deepen your bond.
This means even if you’ve been finding yourself sitting across from your partner lately, trying to conjure up something interesting to say but are coming up blank, we’ve got you covered.
Why Conversation is Essential for Couples
Keeping the conversation going is an essential foundation for any healthy relationship. It helps partners connect on a deeper level, trust each other more, and build intimacy in their relationships. If you’re in a relationship and you aren't talking to your partner regularly, this might be a subtle sign that something is wrong.
When couples stop talking to each other, they can become distant and disconnected. It's important to make time for meaningful conversations and to be very intentional about your communication.
How to Use Conversation Starters
It is not enough to just have a list of conversation starters stashed somewhere. You need to learn how to use them properly to let conversations flow naturally. Bringing up topics your partner has no interest in or idea about is just as good as not having the conversation in the first place.
Remember, sometimes, you don’t need to even have a chat - in the below photo, we were just enjoying the view!
Pick a topic that you and your partner would enjoy discussing. For example, if your partner is a movie love geek, ask them about their favourite movies. Listen actively to what they have to say. Most importantly, show interest in their responses. When you’ve let them get a word in, share your own thoughts and experiences. The conversation should always be a two-way street, so make sure you contribute as much as you like. This means you have to pick a topic you’d also enjoy talking about. Here is a summary of tips for keeping the Conversation Flowing:
Be present and fully engaged in the conversation.
Ask open-ended questions to encourage discussion.
Listen actively and respond with empathy.
Avoid interrupting or dominating the conversation.
Share your own experiences and feelings to deepen the connection.
Fun and Engaging Conversation Starters for Couples
There are a lot of topics you and your partner can pick from to talk about. We’ve listed out a few, but remember you can start a conversation from basically anything you feel you and your partner would be interested in talking about. Here are some fun and engaging conversation starters for couples that will help you guys:
Remember, these topics can also be used while texting, or in a long distance relationship.
Questions Relating to Childhood Memories
Asking your partner about their favourite childhood memories can be a great way to learn more about their past and what shaped them into the person they are today. Childhood memories are often tied to strong emotions and can reveal a lot about a person's values, personality, and interests.
By asking these types of questions, you can gain insight into what your partner enjoyed doing as a child, who their role models were, and what experiences had a lasting impact on them. It can also help you understand what your partner finds important and what they may prioritise in their own life. Here are some questions you can ask your partner to get that conversation going:
What was your favourite childhood memory?
What's something you wish you could relive from your childhood?
What was your favourite toy growing up?
Ask your Partner Questions about Travelling
We love to travel (clearly hahah), and we wouldn't have known that we had this shared interest if we didn't bring it up in conversation. Now we travel to different countries together and share our experiences with the world.
You never know, bringing up this conversation with your partner might just have the same effect on you as it did on us. You can lead with questions like these:
Where is the most beautiful place you've ever visited?
If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go?
What's your favourite travel memory?
Who would you like to travel with if you got the chance?
Get to know What Hobbies They Like
Asking about your partner's hobbies shows that you are interested in their passions and want to support their interests. It can also be a way to show that you value and appreciate their individuality.
Your partner's hobbies can reveal a lot about their personality, interests, and values. Start by asking these questions to learn about your partner's interests:
What's something you've always wanted to try but haven't had the chance to?
What's your favourite hobby and how did you get into it?
If you could spend an entire day doing anything you wanted, what would you do?
Personal Growth and Development Questions
These questions allow partners to gain a better understanding of each other's challenges and personal growth journeys. Sharing personal growth experiences can also help build trust, create a sense of vulnerability and promote mutual support.
Asking about what your partner is working to improve about themselves can open up conversations about how you can support each other in achieving personal goals. It can also help to build a more positive and growth-oriented mindset in the relationship.
We do this all of the time, arguably too much! We are always sharing our business ideas and career goals! It motivates us both but also connects us as we share our passions.
Asking about a challenge that your partner has overcome and is proud of can be a great way to show support and admiration for their resilience and strength. You can try out these conversations starters:
What's something you're working on improving about yourself?
What's a challenge you've overcome in your life that you're proud of?
What's a goal you have for your future?
Ask Your Partner about Their Favourites
Do you know all your partner's favourites? Asking them questions like these won’t only stir up new conversations but help you really understand what they like. You might know they like a certain car but do you know what colour they’d prefer it to be in? Find out with these questions:
What's your favourite book/movie/TV show?
What's your favourite food?
What's your favourite way to relax?
Favourite colour?
Ask Your Partner if They Have a Bucket List
Most People have a bucket list of things they’d like to do. We certainly did. They were always great conversation starters and it was fun to know what we both wanted for the future.
We ticked off most of the things we listed together and ended up creating new ones together.
Ask your partner what they have on their bucket list with these questions:
What are some things you want to achieve in your lifetime?
Is there a particular experience or accomplishment that is at the top of your bucket list?
Are there any things on your bucket list that you would want to do together as a couple?
One of our bucket list items was to visit beach clubs in Bali, which we very quickly ticked off!
Relationship Goal Questions
Discussing relationship goals can help identify potential areas of conflict or disagreement early on, allowing couples to address these issues and find a resolution before they become major problems.
It can also help you celebrate your successes and milestones together. Ask relationship goal questions like these:
What do you think makes a relationship strong and healthy?
What are some goals you have for your relationship?
How can we support each other in achieving those goals?
What-If Scenarios
What would you do if you won the lottery?
What if we could switch lives for a day? What would you do?
What if you could live in any time period or era? Where and when would you choose to live?
Personal Beliefs and Values
Sharing personal beliefs and values can also help in decision-making and problem-solving as a couple. When faced with a difficult situation, having a clear understanding of each other's beliefs and values can help you both make a decision that aligns with your shared values and respects each other's beliefs. Here are questions to start with:
What is something you strongly believe in and why?
What are your core values and how have they shaped your life?
How do our beliefs and values align or differ, and how do they impact our relationship?
Ask Them About Some Life Lessons
I’m sure life has taught us all some great lessons, why not ask your partner to share some with you and you can do the same? It doesn't have to be too serious if you don't want them to be. Here are some questions you can try out.
What is one of the most valuable lessons you've learned in your life so far?
How have past experiences or challenges influenced who you are today?
What advice would you give to your younger self, or to someone who is going through a similar experience to one you've had?
General Conversation Starters for Couples
If you’ve exhausted all the other questions you can pick from one of these to ask, they’re also great ways to revive a dull conversation, lighten the room and get you guys set for a day filled with interesting conversations.
What was your favourite childhood memory?
What is your idea of a perfect day?
What are your goals for the future?
What are you most grateful for in life?
If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go?
What is your favourite hobby, and how did you get into it?
What are your favourite TV shows, books, or movies?
What was the most challenging moment in your life, and how did you overcome it?
What are your pet peeves?
What do you like the most about yourself, and what would you like to improve?
What is your favourite thing about our relationship?
What are your favourite childhood cartoons or TV shows?
What are your biggest fears, and how do you deal with them?
If you could have any superpower, what would it be, and why?
What are your thoughts on marriage, and what does it mean to you
What's the best thing that happened to you today?
If you could have any superpower, what would it be and why?
What's your favourite memory of us together?
What's your biggest fear and how do you cope with it?
If you could go back in time and change one thing in your life, what would it be?
What's something you're really proud of that you've accomplished?
What's something that always makes you laugh?
What's a place you've always wanted to visit and why?
What's something you've been meaning to try but haven't yet?
If you could live in any era, which one would you choose and why?
What's your favourite hobby or pastime?
What's a book or movie that's had a big impact on you and why?
If you could switch jobs with anyone for a day, who would it be and why?
What's something you'd like to learn more about?
What's your favourite way to relax or unwind?
If you could have dinner with anyone, living or dead, who would it be and why?
What's something you're looking forward to in the next few months?
What's your favourite thing about our relationship?
If you could go on a dream vacation together, where would you go and what would you do?
What's a piece of advice you've received that's stuck with you?
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
What's your idea of a perfect day?
What's a goal you have for the future?
What's your favourite thing about yourself?
If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?
What's a decision you've made that you're really proud of?
What's something you've always wanted to do but haven't had the chance to do?
If you could have any pet, what would it be and why?
What's something that's been on your mind lately?
What's the best gift you've ever received?
If you could have any talent or skill, what would it be and why?
What's your favourite thing about our home?
What's a place you've been to that you'd love to visit again?
If you could be any character from a book or movie, who would you be and why?
What's a dream you've had that you still remember?
What's a food you love that most people don't?
If you could learn any language, which one would you choose and why?
What's your favourite thing about our city/town?
What's something you've been putting off that you need to do?
What's your favourite way to spend a lazy day?
If you could have any celebrity as a friend, who would it be and why?
What's a talent you have that not many people know about?
What's a place you've never been to but would love to visit?
If you could have any car, what would it be and why?
What's something you're grateful for right now?
If you could have any job for a week, what would it be and why?
What's your favourite way to exercise or stay active?
Conclusion
Using some of these conversation starters can help you deepen your connection with your partner, learn new things about each other, and keep the conversation flowing.
You honestly don’t have to force anything or try to get all the questions in at a go. You can bookmark this page and revisit it when you feel the need to. Remember to be present, engaged, and open-minded during all your conversations.
FAQs about conversation starters for couples
How often should couples have meaningful conversations?
It's important to make time for meaningful conversations regularly. This could be daily, weekly, or whenever you have the opportunity to connect with your partner.
This applies whether you’re talking about deep topics, chatting over text, or late at night.
What if I'm uncomfortable sharing personal information during conversations?
It's okay to take things slow and gradually open up to your partner. Start with lighter topics and build up to more personal discussions as you become more comfortable.
How do I keep the conversation from becoming one-sided?
Make sure you're actively listening to your partner and asking open-ended questions. Share your own experiences and feelings to keep the conversation balanced.
Can using conversation starters help repair a damaged relationship?
Using conversation starters can certainly help rebuild a damaged relationship by fostering open communication, creating a safe space to express feelings, and finding common ground.
How can we make sure our conversations stay positive and avoid conflicts?
Avoid negative or accusatory language and focus on expressing your own feelings and experiences. Take breaks if needed
