Long-Distance Relationship Advice: 10+ Tips for Success
Being miles away from the person you love can take a toll on any relationship. Because of work and our different businesses, we used to be long distance for about 2 years! Robyn was in London and Henry was in Cardiff!
This has meant we have plenty of long distance relationship advice for you to learn from and deploy in your own relationship, whether you’re texting or in person.
Even for the strongest of couples, maintaining a long-distance relationship can be a challenge, with geographical distance, time zone disparities, and physical separation all putting a strain on the connection.
How long distance makes us feel…
Even though it wasn’t easy we didn’t let any of these factors stop us. We believe that with the right mindset, communication, and effort, long-distance relationships can be successful and fulfilling.
From our experience, many couples find that the challenges they overcome while apart make their relationship stronger in the long run. We know how hard not having your partner around can be, so in this article, we’ll provide you with proven tips for success in a long-distance relationship.
This includes effective relationship communication tips, expectations, and staying connected despite the distance. Even if you're in a new long-distance relationship or you've been apart from your partner for a while, this article can help you build and maintain a strong connection no matter the miles between you.
Understanding the Challenges of Long-Distance Relationships
As a couple who's been there, we can tell you it's not always sunshine and rainbows. But if you're willing to put in the effort and make it work, it can be a pretty rewarding experience.
There are definitely some challenges you should be aware of before you dive in headfirst. Some of the common challenges include:
Distance and time zone differences: Distance can be tough. Like, really tough. No more spontaneous dates or quick cuddles when you're feeling down. It can be a real bummer when you're missing your significant other and can't just hop in the car and go see them.
Lack of physical contact: On your lowest of days, sometimes you’ll need your partner to be there with you. There are some emotions you just can’t express over a video or voice call.
Communication issues: Another challenge is communication. When you're not physically together, it can be easy for things to get lost in translation. Tone can be misinterpreted, and you can't always rely on body language to convey your feelings. That being said, being able to communicate effectively is key in any relationship, but it's especially important when you're apart.
Trust and jealousy: Trust is absolutely essential in a long-distance relationship. Without trust, the distance can quickly breed jealousy and insecurity. It's important to have open and honest conversations about your feelings and boundaries and to be willing to trust your partner when they're not around.
Different social lives: Sometimes we were in time zones that are hours apart. During those times we almost live separate lives and the only communication we get are missed calls and texts.
This is one major challenge that every couple in a long-distance relationship should prepare for. But sometimes it can just be because your partner is super busy and this might hinder communication.
Setting Clear Expectations
Before you go your separate ways, you guys have to sit down and brainstorm what you think will happen in the months to come.
Ask yourself things like what can we do to keep the spark alive? What are things that could annoy you if we aren't apart? How many times should I tell you I love you in a day?
Clear communication is essential in any relationship, but it's even more important in long-distance relationships. Setting clear expectations from the beginning can help avoid misunderstandings and conflicts. Some of the expectations you should discuss with your partner include:
How often you'll communicate
Your preferred mode of communication
Your future plans
How you'll handle conflicts
How you’ll make time out to physically see each other
Making Time for Each Other
Making time for each other is crucial in any relationship, but it's especially important in long-distance relationships. With the distance and time zone differences, it can be challenging to find time to connect.
When we were long distant we always made sure we had a call every week where we would check-in with each other. So, even if that week was especially busy, then we knew that we had a check-in point in the week with each other.
Making time for each other shows your partner that they are a priority in your life. Some ways to make time for each other include:
Scheduling regular video calls
Sending surprise gifts or care packages
Planning virtual date nights
Trust and Honesty
“A relationship without trust is like a car without fuel, it can’t move ahead.” -Invajy. Trust and honesty are the foundation of any healthy relationship, but they are even more critical in long-distance relationships.
That’s why it’s important to be as honest as possible with your partner, especially when they’re far from you. If you get the chance, you can give them a quick summary of your whole day. This will make them feel included in your life and like they’re still with you.
This was one thing that we always got asked about. ‘How do you trust each other?’ Robyn’s eyelash technician always used to be sceptical about her trust. Especially when Henry went away for a month. People can’t comprehend the kind of trust you need to have in a long distance relationship.
With the lack of physical contact and different social lives, it's easy for jealousy and insecurity to creep in. Being open and honest with each other can help build trust and strengthen the relationship. You can do this to build trust and honesty in your long-distance relationship:
Avoiding keeping secrets from each other
Trusting each other's actions and decisions
Supporting each other's social lives
Respect each other's boundaries
Be reliable
Prioritise your relationship
Keeping the Romance Alive
When you’re not together, there’s only so much you can do to make your partner feel loved. It’s hard to feel appreciated. What happens is that the romance just dies away, and once this happens it’s hard to get things back to the way they were to continuously keep that spark going and the romance alive try these:
Plan surprise visits and dates with your partner
Sending love letters or romantic messages
Watching movies or TV shows together virtually
Taking Care of Yourself
Sometimes we’re too hung up on our partner's well-being and we lose track of ourselves. Most people don’t know this but for any relationship to thrive, you have to put yourself first sometimes. Taking care of yourself is crucial in any relationship, but it's especially important in long-distance relationships.
You can easily start feeling lonely and isolated when you don't practise self-care. When we were long distance, Robyn would always do things for herself. Going for spin classes, getting her nails done, seeing friends for dinner & walks! All of these things help you to remember you are your own person first, before being half of a relationship.
Taking care of yourself can help you feel more confident and secure in the relationship. Try these tips:
Pursuing your hobbies and interests
Connecting with friends and family
Dealing with Conflicts
Conflicts can be more challenging to handle in long-distance relationships. When you’re not actually there with your partner, it's easy for arguments to escalate. One way to manage conflict is to practise effective communication and conflict resolution skills, you can handle conflicts in a healthy way.
A huge no-no is ignoring your partner because you’re avoiding conflicts. This happens a lot, especially to women. Men tend to shy away from conversations and somehow think this will resolve problems. It is very important for both parties to resolve issues and conflicts as soon as they arise. Dragging things will only put a strain on your relationship.
The Importance of a Plan
Whenever Henry visited London, we ensured we had a weekend full of fun activities
Having a plan for the future is especially important in long-distance relationships. You need to know that you’re not just giving up your time and energy for something that’s going to crumble in the long run.
Are both of you in it long-term? Do you have plans of being together forever? You should ask a lot of questions so you’ll know how to plan out not only the relationship but your life.You both need to be on the same page about where you are in the relationship and where you would like to be.
We always knew that our distance would end. We planned to move abroad together and knew that we would both be based in the same place in the UK after that. This helped us to not get bogged down in the distance and embrace it while it lasted.
Having a plan can help give the relationship direction and purpose. Some things to consider when making a plan include:
Setting a timeline for when you'll close the distance
Discussing where you'll live and how you'll support each other
Making plans for visits and trips
Keep your partner involved in all your activities so you never run out of things to talk about.
Conclusion
It takes a lot from you, we’ll be honest but, maintaining a successful long-distance relationship requires effort, communication, and a positive mindset from both partners. It’s not easy to be away from your partner for even a few days but some relationships require you to go months without seeing each other physically.
During those times you have to be strong and practise the tips mentioned in this article. It’s not a sure-fire to success but, it certainly got us through some rocky times. I hope our relationship inspires you to keep fighting for yours and that this article prepares you for what's to come.
LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP ADVICE FAQS
How often should we communicate in a long-distance relationship?
How often each couple communicates can vary. It's essential to discuss your communication expectations with your partner and find a schedule that works for both of you.
How can we build trust in a long-distance relationship?
Being open and honest with each other, developing healthy texting habits, avoiding keeping secrets, and trusting each other's actions and decisions, are all ways to build trust in a long-distance relationship.
How can we keep the romance alive in a long-distance relationship?
Planning surprise visits, sending love letters or romantic messages, and watching movies or TV shows together virtually are all ways to keep the romance alive in a long-distance relationship.
What should we do if we have a conflict in a long-distance relationship?
Effective communication and conflict resolution skills are essential in handling conflicts in a healthy way. Avoiding blaming or accusing each other, using "I" statements instead of "you" statements, and listening to each other's perspectives are all ways to deal with conflicts in a long-distance relationship.
How important is having a plan for the future in a long-distance relationship?
Having a plan for the future can give the relationship direction and purpose. Setting a timeline for closing the distance, discussing where you'll live and how you'll support each other, and making plans for visits and trips are all important aspects of a plan for the future in a long-distance relationship.
